Monday, May 01, 2006

Alien Invasion

There are things I intend to do, thought I’d do, will never do, don’t care to do. There are also things I think I should care about and often pretend to care about; but don’t give a rip about.
Welcome to the freak show. May I present the incredible square-peg-in-a-round-hole woman.
I think I should want more stuff but stuff gets lets interesting to me all the time. Oh, I have my weaknesses (most of them edible). I do likes my Sketchers. I like fashion, cheap jewelry, pretty stuff for my house. I like good coffee and can justify unjustifiable prices to get it. I like cool mugs to put my coffee in and never feel I have enough.
I like books and will buy as many as you will let me, and then a few more that I’ll hide. I want to own them and I think when books are thrown all over the house in corners and under furniture and on tables it’s the ultimate home decor accessory.
I pay an embarrassing amount of money regularly to try to make something acceptable of this stuff on my head that God tried to pass for my hair.
I wear Levis jeans given my choice. I like to buy new scrubs constantly. I don’t, but I would if I could. Then after I have several sets, I decide I don’t want to wear scrubs anymore and they hang in my closet for months.
So you see, I’m not a poster child for living simply. I will never be the Amish Woman of the Year.
But less and less stuff catches my attention these days. I used to long for a new house. Now, if you gave me one I’d move in tonight. But the longing part is gone. My house is what it is. And what it is; is a temporary shelter.
I would like to Tai Bo my body into a kick boxing bikini worthy piece of art. But I won’t. My body is what it is. And what it is; is a temporary dwelling.
I have dreams of a stellar career that I won’t pursue. Because my career is what is. And what it is; is a temporary means to provide for myself and my family.
Are you seeing a pattern? I don’t care as much about the stuff of life as I used to. I don’t worry about remodeling or replacing things that are not part of the grand scheme. Yeah, I still want stuff. I have my moments of wanting and wishing. But fewer than before and farther between.
I’m not built for this side of life. I have purposes and plans but if they don’t carry over; they are only a tiny blip on my radar. It isn’t something I’ve really worked at so much as something that God is working in me. Call it priorities.
I don’t care if my kids have neat bedrooms. I care if they serve Christ.
I don’t care if I understand why some people don’t like me. I care if God is pleased with me.
I don’t care if I have a big bank account, I care if I use my finances with honor and ethics.
TV? I can take it or leave it. Movies? Sure, but they better be good! Books, well yeah, as I said; I do have my weaknesses.
But God? Can’t get enough. Worship, music, the Bible. Fascinating, compelling, riveting. The air I breathe, to steal a quote.
I’m letting go of earth although I’ve no reason to think I won’t live here for several more decades. The stuff I long for is off in the distance. But I can see the outlines.

Hebrews 11:13
All these people were still living by faith when they died. They did not receive the things promised; they only saw them and welcomed them from a distance. And they admitted that they were aliens and strangers on earth.

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