The Mr.'s cell phone rang yesterday and the caller ID said it was our neighbor, Dave. Actually the neighbor across the street in our old house. Jay still lives in the old house so he still feels like a neighbor. Plus he's just the nicest guy and our friendly neighborhood auto mechanic. He can fix anything and never charges enough to make it worth his while.
Anyway, it wasn't Dave calling. It was his brother Tim. Tim was going through Dave's cell calling all the numbers to inform his friends that on Saturday, Dave took his own life.
Jay had called us Saturday afternoon when we were expecting him over to say he couldn't get out of his driveway, it was blocked by an ambulance. Now we know why. Dave leaves behind two sons; one in high school and the other 21 years old who is in the Marines. His school teacher wife is left to be both mom and dad to these boys as she tries to heal from the loss of her husband.
You'd think in my business I'd gain a certain ability to distance myself but it's not so. I'm as shocked as anybody else. And angry and sad and guilt-ridden. Why guilt? How can a guy live across the street from a psych nurse and commit suicide? Because it happens. People carry dark secrets and hopelessness inside their chests sometimes. No matter how willing I would have been to help him, he didn't allow me the honor. I don't know why Dave decided he could not face Easter morning. That this day of unspeakable joy for me was a day he could not wake up to makes this all the sadder. The day that defines hope was a day too late.
Please join me in praying for the peace of all those left in the wake of this tragedy. Dave knew Jesus. It is my hope that despite this final act of self-destruction, that Easter found him finally joyfully resting at the feet of Jesus.
1 Corinthians 13:12 For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.