1. Don't get your panties in a twist about Santa vs. Jesus. They both think you need to lighten up.
2. Eat a freakin' cookie. Diet on January 2.
3. There is no such thing as too many lights on a Christmas tree.
4. Buy new pajama pants. Wear them to Christmas dinner.
5. Grown-ups need stockings too. Ahem!
6. Commemorative anythings will not increase in value.
7. Never "skip it this year." Traditions die quickly.
8. Christmas carols sung the old-fashioned way are far superior to new and improved versions.
9. People who do not watch Christmas specials will not go to heaven.
10. Kielbasa trays are fabulous.