Monday, January 01, 2007
Happy New Year!
Although it happens between seasons, the new year seems to be a time that draws us toward the feeling of beginnings and endings. Past and present, epilogue and prologue. The collision of hope and disappointment captured in the tick of the second hand of a clock.
For me, the finest intentions bubble to the surface in the new year. I feel focused and ready. The perfect opportunity stands before me to do the things that need doing and to stop the things that need stopping. But then those seasons roll on by, with life distracting me day by day and another New Year’s Eve stands ready to accuse me of another 365 wasted days to mock my fine intentions of a year ago.
I’ve made my list of resolutions for as long as I can remember only abandoning the practice a few years ago, right around the time I started finding the me in God to replace the me of my own design. This God- inspired person didn’t accomplish all the things on all those lists but rather handed the pencil to a better author. There were hopes and plans I had to let Him erase from my ledger. More than once I’ve written them back in only to bow my head and lay down my pencil. Again.
Then there were expectations and opportunities that He added to my life that I would’ve preferred to erase. Things that scared me, challenged me and changed me.
I’ve learned that my lists are written in pencil and His seem to be in Sharpie. Mine fade and are easily erased. Not so His.
This year has found me again with a smeared game plan clutched in my hands. I didn’t do these, I kept on doing that, I tried to run away from this. And again I hand my crumpled ideas to God and He hands me back the scroll upon which my life is written.
Only now I let myself hear the resolution of my Savior.
It’s a single word.
One word to cover the mistakes and the blunders and the wishes that never came true. Of the thousands of words I’ve hurled against myself and all the promises I’ve made to heaven about fresh starts this one word remains.
For my past and my future. For your history and your eternity.
For every season of celebration and grief there is a word written that defines a sacred purpose.
We are not made of disappointment or wishes but of mercy and promises.
May the midnight hour strike as 2007 finds you made new in grace.
And he that sat upon the throne said, Behold, I make all things new. And he said unto me, Write: for these words are true and faithful.