Week one back to work and a lesson in humility for me. I've worked four hour days except for Tuesday when I had to stay home with a little bit of bleeding at my incision. Today I'll work the second half of the day and then I will welcome the weekend for a few days of much-needed rest.
I understood full well the extent of my surgery and the pain and restrictions that would accompany it. What I underestimated was the impact on my stamina to manage it. There's determination and then there's pride and I think I may have leaned toward the latter. I'm a terrible patient, as most nurses are. I don't like being taken care of and I don't manage feeling weak or needy. Of course, if you don't submit to the care you need, ironically you can extend the amount of time you need that care. I don't think I quite crossed that line but I probably got pretty close to it.
I'm fortunate that my job is relatively flexible so I have been able to relocate to an office on the first floor and limit my tasks to desk work. Even with those accommodations, I'm just plain tired and achy after a few hours. Actually, I'm done in after putting on make up! Also frustrating, I don't feel as mentally sharp as usual (or maybe I usually convince myself I'm sharper than I am.) It seems to take all of the energy in my body to just remain upright and look attentive! The only thing I remember to do is shriek "Don't hug me!" when people want to welcome me back to work! The tiredness also lowers my already low thresh hold of bluntness resulting in statements like, "I gotta go home, my nipples hurt."
Monday will be week three post surgery. My concern now is the continued healing of the incisions. Some of the areas have already closed but there remains quite a bit not yet healed over. Perhaps the biggest achievement of week two was that (with the use of extra pillows for propping and cushioning,) I have been able to sleep on my side. This has greatly improved the quality of my sleep.
I had better start getting myself together for work as I still move in slow motion. My morning routine used to take about 20 minutes but it's about an hour now to get presentable.
Have a wonderful Friday!
1 comment:
I think the loss of stamina is always surprising after surgery, even if you've gone through it before. It's also one of the hardest parts to deal with. You're doing great...me, I'm still so tired!
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