I think I’m a little bit naive, which comes as a surprise to me. I really didn’t realize how people would react to my attempts at spiritual maturity. I know, I know that Christ taught to expect some opposition. But still, it catches me off -guard and I’m open to advice on how to deal with it.
I have had quite a lot of experience with the consequences of immaturity. I’m well-schooled at what rolls back into my life in response to anger, criticism, bitterness, pettiness, unkindness. I’ve spent too much money and then lived with the bill collectors on the phone. I know about the holes I dig for myself.
Here’s a new twist on the theme though. I’m trying, truly I am, to grow up. So I’m working very hard at walking in wisdom in my life. A big part of the lesson for me is one I’ve shared before, shutting my pie hole. Another issue of mine, anger, is also finding its way out the back door of my heart. So I’m making some headway on those things.
Enter the weirdness. I have people now in my life angry at me for not getting angry with them. Huh? Not angry AT them, but joining them in their anger at someone else. How do you respond to this craziness? I was not prepared to have someone respond to me in anger because I wasn’t angry. I feel like I’m back in the angry hole again but somebody else is now digging it and pushing me in! AND I’m really having to work extra hard at not getting angry at person A who is angry at person B and so angry at me for not being angry with them! Are you taking notes, because you’re gonna need a score card and a pie chart to keep up.
Not to mention that when I’m in the presence of a slamming session and don’t join in; I become Public Enemy #1.
It all sounds silly but it’s very real right now in my life and I’m stumped. There’s that maturing spirit inside of me that reminds me that this is what the New Testament writers told me would happen. There’s that knowledge that this is one marker that I’m heading in the right direction. I am aware but still my emotional self is stunned. I thought these strides would make my life easier and it is getting harder.
I asked my husband last night what advice he might offer and with great wisdom he replied, “I think you should ignore it.” Well, that solved, let me see, where’s my list? Hmmmm, that solved NOTHING.
I can’t ignore it. It’s making me want to say something, it’s making me angry. Wait a minute, those are the things I’m trying to walk away from. Those are the muscles I’m trying to build. Could it be that this is part of my personal training program? I hate it when that happens. Then again, it puts me right in the middle of the New Testament church, right where they were. Right where Paul talks about counting it all joy, this honor of being set apart and not fitting in.
I have always presumed the rejection would be in the form of standing for morality and holiness. I didn’t know that my very character, my personality; would offend people as I tried to emulate Christ.
It can hurt guys, finally cutting those ties to the world and the me that resides there. It can leave me aware of how much of me still remains that wants acceptance from men more than God. It points out how much I’ve laid down, and how much I’m still carrying.
I’m not supposed to fit in. I’m going to have to remember that. Rejection is in the response. I reject the world, the world rejects me. Good enough for Jesus, and I’ve yet to confront an angry crowd and public execution. And the revelation rolls on.
1 Samuel 8:7
And the LORD told him: "Listen to all that the people are saying to you; it is not you they have rejected, but they have rejected me as their king.
1 Peter 2:4
As you come to him, the living Stone—rejected by men but chosen by God and precious to him
Hebrews 11:13
All these people were still living by faith when they died. They did not receive the things promised; they only saw them and welcomed them from a distance. And they admitted that they were aliens and strangers on earth.
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