Tuesday, August 05, 2008
My husband recently teased me that "everybody" gets on my nerves. He is more or less correct. Partly because I am simply not a people person and I'd rather be alone most of the time, I guess by default you could say that people get on my nerves. Secondly because people just get on my nerves, period. They irritate me sometimes. And some of them irritate me all of the time. The Mr., on the other hand, is rarely irritated. I do find it amusing that he will state that someone is "just an idiot, what do you expect" and then deny that they irritate him.
As a young bride there were relatives on my husband's side that irritated me no end. I ran the spectrum from full-on desperate (and humiliating) attempts to win their favor to downright not caring and telling them so when my attempts kept falling flat. Of course, these folks also let me know that I irritated them. Which irritated me even further. How dare they! Of course, I now am quite certain they were saying, "How dare she!"
We all irritate each other. That is the long and short of it. As sure as people irritate me, I am well aware that I can be as equally offensive. It is the nature of living amongst this filthy rabble we call humanity. In general, we're just idiots, what do you expect?
The problem with my relationship with the "other side" back in those days was that I was shocked and hurt that I irritated them and they likewise. None of us were mature enough to realize that real relationships are like body surfing, you ride to the crest and back down again. Struggling against the tide just pulls you into the under tow.
I think it's normal that people sometimes irritate, annoy, aggravate, offend and disappoint us. In fact, I think it might be an exercise in growth if we are able to simply allow that reality to reflect back. If I find you so irritating, it's likely you or someone else sees me in the same light. For the sake of change? Sometimes. On a grander scale I see it for the sake of grace. I wanted Dean's family to see me as all kinds of wonderful and therefore love me. But that isn't really love. Love sees the cracks in our facades and either reaches out to repair them or sees them as part of a beautiful whole.
When someone irritates me, I need to remember my own need for grace; stretch out my arms and let my body ride the crest of life. If not, we will all drown in the struggle.
Isaiah 57:19 & 20 "...creating praise on the lips of the mourners in Israel. Peace, peace, to those far and near,"says the LORD. "And I will heal them. But the wicked are like the tossing sea,which cannot rest,whose waves cast up mire and mud.