Friday, April 07, 2006

Stupid Evangelism Trick #3

By popular demand...Stupid Evangelism Trick #3
Christian paraphernalia.
What do you mean, Sara?
T-shirts, bumper stickers (current favorite: “Get Right or Get Left ”), Jesus fish affixed to anything with a smooth surface, fridge magnets, artwork involving a poem about footprints, violins or depicting a very sad sinner clearly sorry for his dastardly ways, etc, etc, etc.
Ooooh, I’ve gone and done it now, haven’t I? Oh, no she didn’t Aw snap
Actually I’m kind of surprised you came back after Stupid Trick #2. Clearly you’re waiting for Mambo #5.
Anyway, before you beat me with your giant wooden cross wall hanging, use the following formula to decide how much you despise me.
1. Are the aforementioned items used in your life as a statement and celebration of your faith and reconciliation to Christ through grace? If yes, that’s cool; continue reading to question 2.
2. Are the aforementioned items used in your life as potential prompts for conversations about how utterly amazing God is? If yes, I’m loving you so far; continue to question 3.
3. Are the aforementioned items used to condemn, judge, embarrass or prove you are superior to sinners and other less holy attired Christians? If no then you may leave a comment about how true this all is and go about your business. If yes, then you are a NUMBER THREE TRICKSTER .
Still here? Ok, let’s continue. May I hereby officially request that if you are a 3-er, please oh please slow your roll player and rethink this evangelism tool. Here’s my beef with this method.
If you are representing and offending at the same time, you’re making life pretty hard on the rest of us. If you’re going to wear that t shirt, cross necklace, WWJD bracelet and fish baseball cap please be the most loving and least condemning person in the room. And think about dialing down the road rage. And don’t park in the handicap space unless you’re handicapped. And don’t smile while you’re telling people they’re headed for H-E-double hockey sticks. And don’t tip less than 4%. And don’t send your meal back 14 times because your fries are too crispy. And don’t share the salad bar with your spouse whom you’re not paying for. And don’t have either the worst behaved kids in the history of creation or beat them into a stupor because they didn’t call you sir. And don’t be the laziest person in your work place. And don’t come in late and leave early.
And do extend genuine love and concern into the lives of those around you, especially the cranky ones. And do go the extra mile when your boss needs you to. And do smilingly give up the good parking space. And do tip the girl who cuts your hair at Bo Ric’s for $7/hour. And do forgive 70x7. And do offer to and then pray for hurting people. And do go back and ask about the people you promised to pray for. And do admit you have problems too but Jesus gives you what you need to make it. And do worship with your life and not just your bumper sticker. And do get rid of that “Get Right or Get Left” bumper sticker, it’s stupid.
Letting the dressings of your life express the joy of your salvation: Cool beanz.
Wearing a t-shirt with John 3:16 on it and treating people like doo: Stupid Evangelism Trick #3.

John 13:35 (New International Version)
35By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.

5 comments:

Margie said...

WOO HOO! Sara!! Great Blog!

tina fabulous said...

i thought the get right or get left bumper stickers were merely pointing out my lane options... DANG IT!

i believe that if you cant figure out what jesus would do without prompting from a bracelet, accessorizing should be the least of your worries.

Pat said...

Good blog, Sara. Lots of wisdom.
Fabulous Tina, great insight...you should have your own blog! I read you daily and also enjoy it very much.

SunnySusan said...

Great blog Sara !!

I like "Christians are perfect, just forgiven" bumper sticker, and the car is passing you at 90 MPH

SunnySusan said...

Ooops...that's are NOT perfect...just like my spelling